An Argentine love affair

What a fantastic day this has been – The best part of it is that this is just the beginning – of my stay here in Buenos Aires and I can feel it - of a long passionate love affair with this city and its Tango!

I arrived BA today at 7:45am. As Federico recommended, I took the Manuel Tien Leon shuttle from the Airport to La casa de Maria Tango (Picture 1). It took me about 45 min to get to the Maria’s. I was met by Daniela, Maria’s assistant - a charming young Argentine woman. She showed me to my room and gave me a brief tour of the guesthouse. I was introduced to Tota (who is in charge of housekeeping). And then over breakfast met Bert and Herna a delightful couple from Holland who have been here at Maria’s for 5 weeks and spending their last night in the city tonight. A quick shower later I met Luis, one of the Tango instructors at the house and have scheduled an appointment for tomorrow at 9:30am for my first official Argentine tango lesson in the city of its birth. I met Federico (Maria’s son) and Stephanie (a young French Student who works at Maria’s) who helped answer all my questions and helped schedule an additional (group) lesson for me for tomorrow mid-morning. Stephanie took me for a walk around the neighbourhood and showed me where the Laundromat, Grocery store and shopping mall is around here. I wanted to buy a sim card for my phone, went to a phone store but the card did not work with my phone. Have no idea why – I will try again tomorrow – if it does not work – no big deal – May be good to be cut off from the rest of the world for a little bit :)

Bert and Herna were planning on going to an afternoon milonga (tango dance) and asked me if I wanted to join them – How could I refuse – isn’t that what I am here for after all – so what if it is my first day here in BA, I have only been dancing 4 months and I have no idea if I am good enough to dance with complete strangers – and true Porteño (that is what the men from Buenos Aires are called). Worse case, I thought I would sit it out. Just soak in the atmosphere and watch the pros do their stuff. However, dance I did.

First – a few milonga etiquettes – some that I was advised of before from Louie and some I learned today thanks to Herna and Bert –
• Never change into your dance shoes in the milonga hall. It is frowned upon. Do it in the ladies room.
• Ask to be seated in the front row – greatly increases your chances of being asked to dance.
• Women do not ask men to dance with them. They have to be asked by the men.
• But they can flirtatiously smile at them to attract their attention to ask them to dance.
• Men generally do not ask you to dance .. rather it is done by eye contact. The man scans the room, finds his target (ok, the woman he wants to dance with), waits till their eyes lock, then he tilts his head sideways slightly – and that is your invitation, Women have the choice to smile and nod (accept the invitation) or look the other way (decline the dance).
• A couple dances 4 songs (a tanda) together. Unless if one of them is a terrible dancer, you can say thank you in the middle of the tanda and sit down .. and never dance with that person again. – Thankfully that did not happen to me today. Though I think I did get close to frustrating one partner close enough.
• Between the four songs played in a tanda, the couple makes small talk for 20 sec – so even if the next song has started, a true Porteño will wait for 20 sec before starting to dance. After 4 songs – you say gracias and go back to your seat.
• I was told that I should not dance more than 2-3 consecutive tandas with the same person – it would indicate a “come on”
• And no, it is not ok to sleep during the Milonga's like the gentleman above is doing.

Ok – so now with the etiquettes in mind – I was ready to be asked. Except it is so unnerving looking at men trying to catch someones eye. Gawd – by the end of this trip I should be an expert in flirting 101. I locked eyes with one argentine looking dude while walking in the milonga. When seated, my back faced him so could not do that flirtatious “ask me to dance” look. Instead, Herna who faced him got asked to dance. At the end of the tanda, she told me he is Australian and that he wanted to dance with me too. I said good. But then she reminded me that I have to look at him to be asked by him – ah this cat and mouse game – ok so I looked and there was the tilt and I nodded – and we danced. My first dance in Buenos Aires. So what if not with a Porteño – it was with an Australian who looked Argentine and sounded very Australian and best of all – spoke English. Oh, and he was a good dancer too. Name: David. That started the evening well. I had barely sat down and the got asked to dance the next tanda by this older gentleman. Small talk time, I dreaded having to say no habla espaniol (my rehearsed phrase for anyone who tries to talk to me) however to my surprise, he beat me to it. Turns out he is from England. So si – he hablas ingles. Another good dancer. Who made me feel like I was a good dancer. I told him I have been dancing 4 mths (like I told everyone I danced with) and I was pleasantly surprised by the compliments I received for my dancing. My next dance was finally with a true Porteño – it was good. I thought my first song/dance with him was ok… but he said he gives me a 10 for it. (I am assuming that is a 10 out of 10 not 100 ). But I guess that compliment went to my head because he downgraded me to an 8.5 by the end of the tanda. But was super nice about it and said I am doing well for just having danced 4 mths. After that it was just a blur of people I danced with. I got asked to dance 3-4 times by David. About 3-5 times by Gernan, another older Argentine man who was a wonderful dancer, and super patient with me and made me feel so good about my dancing, and a couple of times by another argentine gentleman – I can’t remember the name – I think it was Jorge. Anyways, I danced and danced. I did have one terrible tanda I danced. It was with a Porteño who spoke no English. He kept trying different simple steps with me but for some reason we did not connect and I could not understand what he was telling me (in Spanish). Needless to say after that dance with him, when my eyes just passed over his a while later he quickly turned away – Yes sir! Got your message – you don’t want to dance with me. Not that I did either, but still, felt my first rejection – that too by a 70 year old man. Oh, did I say – this milonga had mostly older people. Good dancers but old. Once 2-3 younger people.

David left. Gave me his card if I wanted to dance with him later to call or email him. Hernan too gave me his contact info for milongas.

Then next stop for us was dinner. I just realized, I had not eaten lunch and was starving. We went to X-toxo – a Spanish restaurant with excellent food. They had just one vegetarian entre – a ravioli – which was excellent. A glass of wine, salad, water, my ravioli, and coffee or for less than $15. Not bad!!!!

I was tired with my dancing and ready to head back – but Bert and Herna were planning on going to another Milonga, It was their last night in the city and they wanted to go to their favorite Milonga at Niño Bien a little time. They told me they would go for just a couple of hours. Considering it was just 9pm and still light outside – I decided to join them as well.

This place was a totally different ambience than La Ideal. More dressy, a lot more younger people, and all really good dancers. It was crowded. Very crowded. We were not able to get front row tables, but that was fine with me. My feet were hurting slightly and I must admit I did feel a little intimated by seeing all these good dancers. Still, I was asked to dance right away by an older argentine man who I found out did not speak English and of course I danced terribly again. I wonder if there is a correlation between my dancing skills and a partner who I cannot talk to and understand. I will see if that holds true for the rest of my stay here. After that I was asked to dance just a couple of times by two others.. another nicer argentine man who spoke very little English but was kinder esp. when I told him soy una principiante (or something like that – telling him I am a beginner). Then I danced with a young guy, a very good dancer, from Singapore. Then I just sat and refused to look across the room for more partners, instead just sat watching the people dance – Or rather, to be more honest, I was just checking out the women’s shoes and trying to see what style I like best for when I go shopping for my shoes. I heard of this place called Comme il faut from a lot of people – very expensive (by argentine standards, but gorgeous unique designs and people swear by the comfort and durability of these sexy strappy 5 inch heeled sandals. So I am tempted. But, will check out the competition (Neo Tango, Flabellas, Darcos).. before I make my pick.. or should I say picks, as I sure won’t be satisfied with just one.

Soon it was time to leave. Bert and Herna were ready to go back (as they leave the next day and did not want to be out too late). Even then, it was 11:30pm by the time we got back to the house.

As I said before, not bad for the first day…. If this is what I can expect for the next 2 weeks… I am in for a treat!